Ditching the toxicity from your life (and yes, that includes people)
I've been planning this blog post solidly for the last week or so. Which makes it incredibly coincidental that just this evening I had a woman leave a nasty comment on one of my facebook ads.
The ad was nothing special. A simple picture about our Valentines day collection that we will be releasing soon, and then a single notification. As with all my notifications, I always click on them to see who has taken time out of their day to engage with me and my page.
Her name.... I'm sure I know this name. I mull over it for a few minutes and then it smacks me square in the face. This person signed up as one of my consultants back in our Party plan days. For about 12 months, we released Divinity & Co. (Divinity Soy Candles back then) as a party plan business.
Things were perfect. My husband had a great job which gave me the freedom to set up the business of my dreams, I had a consultant who then recruited over 40 into her downline so of course, I thought I'd hit the jackpot.
To make things easy for my newly recruited consultants, I offered free kits to anyone who booked and held 2 presentations in their first 20 days. Most of them surpassed this and held (in some cases) 10 presentations so things were looking pretty amazing.
One woman (try and take a guess which one) received her kit and I eagerly awaited the orders from her 2 presentations with bated breath. How would she do? Would her sales be any good? Would she get more referrals? How could I assist her better if she needed help?
During her first 20 days, I'd make regular contact, as I did with all my consultants. Except, as time went on, she'd respond less and less.
As it turns out, she had never booked those presentations. Not a single one. I attempted to contact her to kindly ask for the kit to be returned so I could use it for any other newbies that were willing to sign up legitimately (it was also around this time that I sadly had to start charging for my kits upfront)
Just in case you haven't been following along, I never got the kit back and all my further efforts to contact her went unread (don't you just love Messenger?)
There were phone calls, emails, text messages, chats and even a debt collection letter and NOTHING.
What more could I do? I tried everything I could think of. After a while, I cut my losses - I mean, I'd never have to deal with her again, right?
Fast forward about 3 years, while I'm sitting here planning my next blog post on how you shouldn't have to deal with toxic people and BAM - there she is. Pops up in my notifications like a meerkat hunting for food.
Her comment wasn't anything overly nasty. Just 2 words and yet there was a feeling of unease rising up from my stomach. My heart started racing and I couldn't get rid of the lump in my throat. All from 2 little words out of the mouth of someone I haven't even met face to face.
So, okay. the shitty feeling didn't last all too long. With the help of a Vodka Lemon and reminding myself that I can't make everyone happy (I'm not a Donut) I quickly realised that this will happen. A LOT if I plan to run an online business and blog.
I mean, I'm 39 this year. I've been to hell and back (apparently I'm a VIP there) and I think I deserve to be happy. So for now to the woman who thinks it's fun trying to damage my livelihood (you know, how I feed my kids and pay for the roof over their head) it's delete and BLOCK for you!
From now on, I'll be doing my best to focus on people with healing, nurturing energies and I'll do my best to give it back!